Oneness Part 4

Part 4

Spiritual oneness. Oneness is a pretty incredible thing. Paul referred to it as a “mystery” in Eph 5. Our friend wrote a song for our wedding, “the mystery of ages, that 2 shall come as 2 and leave as 1!” Oneness is hard to really understand and we are still learning after 40 years of marriage! 

Being spiritually connected is very important. The foundation of our marriage is spiritual oneness and needs to be solid and strong (like cement) to withstand the storms we will have in our marriages. The first thing that really attracted me to Jeff 40 years ago was that each time we’d go out on a date we’d pray. He’d read a daily devotional & always pray! It is amazing how close you feel as you pray! There is a saying, “couples that pray together stay together!” We HOPE you are doing this every day! I love the couple in the bible: Aquilla and Priscilla. They served in ministry together and are never mentioned without the other. They made tents together for a living. Some of you work together with your spouse and it can be tough. Paul worked in their tent shop and led them to the Lord. Now they were spiritually one. True oneness can only be found in Christ! Aquilla and Priscilla grew in the word together. Acts 18:4 says Paul taught in the synagogue and I bet they went too! v 11 tells us that Paul taught for 18 months there! Aquilla and Priscilla must have grown spiritually hanging with Paul those 18mo! I want to challenge you to encourage each other spiritually. Jeff and I like to ask each other, “what are learning in our devotions?” It sharpens us spiritually. Praying together and reading the word together are so important! Church offers so many ways to grow. Why not get involved? If you’re not in a life group, do it, you’ll grow! Aquilla and Priscilla offered their home for a fellowship! I think it’s amazing when you serve together how close you get. Mission trips draw you close spiritually! Aquilla and Priscilla took the time for ministry Acts 18:26 says” they took the time to explain the scriptures to Apollos more accurately. ”God wants to use your marriage to help encourage others. Apollos went on to have a big powerful ministry. I think it’s cool Aquilla and Priscilla were faithful to share with him in their home. How can you encourage each other spiritually? How are you a “team” for Jesus?

Oneness Part 3

Part 3

          Oneness involves the spiritual, financial, emotional, geographical, & physical aspects of your life. If you are to be one with your spouse, it involves all these areas. The truth is that building this type of intimacy is a lifelong task. It takes time & attention to have oneness in the marriage relationship. Just realize that there can be no true unity unless both parties are believers. If not born again, that is the first and most important step.

      Do you see yourself as part of a whole in your marriage or do you consider yourself an independent agent? Are there examples of situations where you “do your own thing” without considering how it affects your unity with your spouse? Have you left your family, both physically & emotionally? Do you put your children first or your husband? Is your loyalty to him or do you join their criticism? I have known women who take gifts & money from their parents knowing that their husbands would not approve. Have you been guilty of going behind your husband’s back to your parents for anything? Do you depend upon them emotionally rather than your husband? Are you depending upon them for anything? If so, what do you need to do about it? Have you been guilty of disagreeing with your husband’s discipline in front of your children, in his presence or behind his back? In order to answer this question, think about how you react when your husband disagrees with your parents or when they criticize him. Perhaps you let your children interrupt your conversations with your husband. Perhaps their schedules take priority over your husband’s needs. A loyal wife is respectful to her husband & stands up for him. She uses the internet & social media in a positive & uplifting way. A loyal wife keeps private things private & prioritizes her husband first before turning to her mom, sister or girlfriend.         

Next we will share 5 areas of oneness with you: Spiritual, Financial, Emotional, Geographical & Physical Oneness! 

Oneness Part 2

Part 2 Eph 5:31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

We need to consider what it means to “cleave” so that we can better understand what it means to “leave.” Leave involves more than distance. It is an attitude of the heart. God’s plan for marriage involves oneness. In order for two to become one, they cannot still be attached to anyone else, parents or siblings or friends. There are women who have left their homes in distance, but not emotionally or financially. There are women who live next door to their parents & yet have “left” them. Why is it impossible for a woman to cleave to, or become one with a husband without leaving her family? 

Please understand that this does not mean that you cannot love your family & talk to them, etc.; however, there is a point at which you can be attached to them so strongly that you fail to leave as you should. Sometimes it is the parents who cannot let the child leave. Please don’t be one of those parents. However, notice that the verse clearly calls the child to leave, not the parents to force them out. The responsibility is upon you to make the break from your home. If you are living with your parents or in laws, more than a few weeks, please reconsider. You are playing with fire.

God’s Word gives few examples of homes where the family is following His design. However, we do have a picture of leaving & cleaving that helps us understand the meaning. It comes from the story of Ruth. Although Ruth speaks these words to her mother-in-law rather than her husband, the principle is clear. That is why these verses are so often quoted in wedding ceremonies. Ruth 1:1-18. Ruth is a Moabite widow and is willing to go with Naomi. She was willing to leave and cleave. 

Are you still attached in an unhealthy, unbiblical way? We have seen many marriages destroyed because of these attachments. People usually think they can not afford it. But if this is what God wants, then I am sure there is a way.

Oneness, Intro

The purpose of marriage in the bible is oneness. You & your spouse are one, in every way. You are a team for Jesus. Do you know how many times the Word tells us about this oneness? Gn 2:24, Mt 19:5, Mk 10:8, 1C6:16, E5:31. 5x. Of course everything in the bible is from God & very important. But, there are very few things in the scriptures 5x!  Eph 5:31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

These passages sum up 2 essential elements of marriage: leaving & cleaving. 

First, marriage begins with leaving his or her parents. If leaving your father & mother is necessary, then obviously all lesser ties must be broken, changed, or left behind. A man’s full commitment must be to his wife. A woman’s full commitment must be to her husband.

Unfortunately, this process of leaving never takes place in many marriages. A spouse may think, “If things don’t work out, I’ll run home to Mom.” Or, “If things don’t work out, I’m going to run to my old friends & hang out with them.” But husbands & wives should be friends. Not only that, they should be best friends. It’s good to honor your parents & love them. It’s good to have other friends. But you should have only one best friend in your life, & that should be your husband or wife. Cultivate the friendship in your marriage.

Next, you must cleave. What does it mean “to cleave?” It means “to adhere to, to stick to, to be attached by some strong tie.” The word “cleave” involves a bonding together, much like gluing two things. Gorilla or super glue, the bond is so strong that one has to be careful not to get the glue on your hand or he will become permanently attached to it as well! If this happens, be careful, because you will tear your skin. This is the exact idea. That we are truly one, & separation, division or isolation causes serious damage. Remember what God said? “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mt 19:6, Mk 10:9. Cleave “carries the sense of clinging to someone in affection & loyalty.” You might be thinking, “Yes, that’s me. I’m stuck!” But that isn’t the meaning here. You’re not stuck to something like a fly on flypaper, trying to get loose. Rather, you’re holding on. Imagine walking along the edge of a cliff & suddenly losing your footing. As you go over the side, you grab a branch and hold on to it. It’s something you’ve done by will, because your life depends on it. 

I must examine my life & ask myself if any relationship or pursuit in which I’m currently involved would put distance between my wife & me. Will it draw us together or drive us apart? Will it build our relationship or tear it down? It is not always the big things that bring a marriage down. It is often the small things. As Song of Solomon says, it’s “the little foxes that spoil the vines”. In marriage, it can be neglect, or the unwillingness to hold on tightly to your spouse.

Oneness, Intro

The purpose of marriage in the bible is oneness. You & your spouse are one, in every way. You are a team for Jesus. Do you know how many times the Word tells us about this oneness? Gn 2:24, Mt 19:5, Mk 10:8, 1C6:16, E5:31. 5x. Of course everything in the bible is from God & very important. But, there are very few things in the scriptures 5x!  Eph 5:31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

These passages sum up 2 essential elements of marriage: leaving & cleaving. 

First, marriage begins with leaving his or her parents. If leaving your father & mother is necessary, then obviously all lesser ties must be broken, changed, or left behind. A man’s full commitment must be to his wife. A woman’s full commitment must be to her husband.

Unfortunately, this process of leaving never takes place in many marriages. A spouse may think, “If things don’t work out, I’ll run home to Mom.” Or, “If things don’t work out, I’m going to run to my old friends & hang out with them.” But husbands & wives should be friends. Not only that, they should be best friends. It’s good to honor your parents & love them. It’s good to have other friends. But you should have only one best friend in your life, & that should be your husband or wife. Cultivate the friendship in your marriage.

Next, you must cleave. What does it mean “to cleave?” It means “to adhere to, to stick to, to be attached by some strong tie.” The word “cleave” involves a bonding together, much like gluing two things. Gorilla or super glue, the bond is so strong that one has to be careful not to get the glue on your hand or he will become permanently attached to it as well! If this happens, be careful, because you will tear your skin. This is the exact idea. That we are truly one, & separation, division or isolation causes serious damage. Remember what God said? “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mt 19:6, Mk 10:9. Cleave “carries the sense of clinging to someone in affection & loyalty.” You might be thinking, “Yes, that’s me. I’m stuck!” But that isn’t the meaning here. You’re not stuck to something like a fly on flypaper, trying to get loose. Rather, you’re holding on. Imagine walking along the edge of a cliff & suddenly losing your footing. As you go over the side, you grab a branch and hold on to it. It’s something you’ve done by will, because your life depends on it. 

I must examine my life & ask myself if any relationship or pursuit in which I’m currently involved would put distance between my wife & me. Will it draw us together or drive us apart? Will it build our relationship or tear it down? It is not always the big things that bring a marriage down. It is often the small things. As Song of Solomon says, it’s “the little foxes that spoil the vines”. In marriage, it can be neglect, or the unwillingness to hold on tightly to your spouse.

Devo 21 Oneness, part 1

The purpose of marriage in the bible is oneness. You & your spouse are one, in every way. You are a team for Jesus. Do you know how many times the Word tells us about this oneness? Gn 2:24, Mt 19:5, Mk 10:8, 1C6:16, E5:31. 5x. Of course everything in the bible is from God & very important. But, there are very few things in the scriptures 5x!  Eph 5:31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

These passages sum up 2 essential elements of marriage: leaving & cleaving. 

First, marriage begins with leaving his or her parents. If leaving your father & mother is necessary, then obviously all lesser ties must be broken, changed, or left behind. A man’s full commitment must be to his wife. A woman’s full commitment must be to her husband.

Unfortunately, this process of leaving never takes place in many marriages. A spouse may think, “If things don’t work out, I’ll run home to Mom.” Or, “If things don’t work out, I’m going to run to my old friends & hang out with them.” But husbands & wives should be friends. Not only that, they should be best friends. It’s good to honor your parents & love them. It’s good to have other friends. But you should have only one best friend in your life, & that should be your husband or wife. Cultivate the friendship in your marriage.

Next, you must cleave. What does it mean “to cleave?” It means “to adhere to, to stick to, to be attached by some strong tie.” The word “cleave” involves a bonding together, much like gluing two things. Gorilla or super glue, the bond is so strong that one has to be careful not to get the glue on your hand or he will become permanently attached to it as well! If this happens, be careful, because you will tear your skin. This is the exact idea. That we are truly one, & separation, division or isolation causes serious damage. Remember what God said? “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mt 19:6, Mk 10:9. Cleave “carries the sense of clinging to someone in affection & loyalty.” You might be thinking, “Yes, that’s me. I’m stuck!” But that isn’t the meaning here. You’re not stuck to something like a fly on flypaper, trying to get loose. Rather, you’re holding on. Imagine walking along the edge of a cliff & suddenly losing your footing. As you go over the side, you grab a branch and hold on to it. It’s something you’ve done by will, because your life depends on it. 

I must examine my life & ask myself if any relationship or pursuit in which I’m currently involved would put distance between my wife & me. Will it draw us together or drive us apart? Will it build our relationship or tear it down? It is not always the big things that bring a marriage down. It is often the small things. As Song of Solomon says, it’s “the little foxes that spoil the vines”. In marriage, it can be neglect, or the unwillingness to hold on tightly to your spouse.

Thanks for stopping by!

Find our latest updates under the MEXICO link above!